Motherhood is a beautiful journey that many little girls dream of, but is it something we should be obligated and forced into wanting? When interviewed on Hekayty, Egyptian/Austrian actress, Mona Hala, admitted that she had no intention of becoming a mother.
“I decided I didn’t want to be a mother,” Hala admits. ” If I wake up and decide to pack my bags and travel, I can. However, with a child, that isn’t really an option. My freedom is more important than starting a family.”
Once this interview was aired on Girl’s Space Facebook page, many people – women especially – started to attack Hala on her decision of not wanting to become a mother. Below are some of the comments:
Since when is it okay to judge a person’s opinion and life choices when it doesn’t affect others at all? Every person knows what they can and cannot handle and the responsibilities they’re willing to take on.
How many children come into this world unwanted, unloved, and end up with psychological traumas and difficulties because of the way they were raised? When a person has the mercy to spare a child from these traumas or has the honesty and self-awareness to be able to admit that they are incapable of raising a child or putting a child first, does that make them inhumane and worthy of such hatred?
In this video, Hala shares her opinion and explains what brought her to this decision. However, she never states that this should be a general opinion or thought, she does not advocate others to do the same and definitely doesn’t judge women for deciding to have kids. So what gives us the right to judge her lifestyle and take offense against her logic?
The Internet can be such a mean and judgmental place where bullies hide behind screens and condemn anyone for their thoughts, actions, and beliefs just because they don’t feel the same way. There’s a dialogue for discussions and there are personal beliefs that no one should have a right to interfere in. We should learn to be kind, humane, and try to understand where a person is coming from rather than bash and criticize them and even go as far as to label them.
However, that doesn’t mean that everyone found her ideologies and expression to be irrational. Some women found her honesty and self-awareness to be admirable and inspiring and praised her for knowing her capabilities and knowing what she wants:
Motherhood isn’t an easy task; it comes with a lot of responsibilities, sacrifices, and requires so much patience to be able to raise sane, happy, mentally stable children. When a person feels they’re not up for that, who are we to judge them for it? Just because one person can do it, it doesn’t mean everyone can.
We live in a society that mostly holds the mother accountable for her children. The patriarchal society we live in is extended in the home and the children are a mother’s responsibility, while the father provides for the family. The pressure and load of raising children, taking care of them, and doing the countless daily chores is not something to be taken lightly.
Not all humans were created equal; some were born with the ability to sacrifice their entire lives for their children, others juggle between work and raising the kids, while some people know deep down in their hearts that they just can’t do it. That in itself should be applaudable and not something to scrutinize a person.
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