We are all panicking. We are all on edge. If one of my kids coughs, I call my doctor. If my throat hurts, I try to recall every single person I met and surface I touched to calm myself down. I keep telling myself that this is just too new and we need time to adapt and relax. Yet, one particular kind of behavior that is quite obvious and unfortunate on social media is mommy shaming.
I work in a parenting and motherhood platform and we get to see all sorts of messages and Facebook group posts on a daily basis. It all started when most of us decided to plead the government to shut down schools to prevent coronavirus transmission amongst children. Not every mom felt the same and it ignited a vicious cycle of shaming, judgment, and insults. Apparently, stay-at-home moms believe that any woman who chooses to go to work and try to find a place for her kids in the meanwhile is a heartless mom risking her kid’s life.
You need to understand the reasons why not all working moms wanted schools to be shut down:
- The woman you accused of being unworthy of motherhood might be a single mom who supports a whole family.
- Her husband or child might be sick and she needs to bring in the cash.
- The woman you shamed might be responsible for a whole team whom she can’t bail on during a crisis.
- The insulted mom can be a doctor, bank employee, supermarket worker, or a pharmacist. People who are crucial to us.
- She might be so scared of losing her job because she knows she’ll never find another.
- She might be an infection-control freak who is more careful at work than you are at the supermarket.
- This mom might, in fact, love her child more than you will ever comprehend.
- This mom might not respond to a global crisis like you because we are different. Some panic, others don’t.
The coronavirus is already showing everyone’s true colors. Please don’t forget that we are all on the same boat. We have different experiences. Not all of us have the luxury of hiding at home until a vaccine magically appears. Be kind to one another. Insulting women online says more about you than the mom feeling trapped in an essential job.